Associates

What all come to understand is that there is no such thing as a neutral exchange. You leave someone either a little better or a little worse.3 The best among us leave others a little better with every nod, every inflection, every interface.

You can make more friends in two months by becoming more interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get people interested in you.

Does the hard-skilled manager who sits in lofty obscurity lording over his reports trump the hard-skilled manager who walks among his people, who is known, seen, and respected by his people? While the former might win some success by forcing his hand for a time, his influence is fatally flawed because his power is not bestowed on him by his people.

don’t criticize, condemn, or complain; talk about others’ interests; if you’re wrong, admit it; let others save face. Such principles don’t make you a clever conversationalist or a resourceful raconteur. They remind you to consider others’ needs before you speak. They encourage you to address difficult subjects honestly and graciously. They prod you to become a kinder, humbler manager, spouse, colleague, salesperson, and parent. Ultimately, they challenge you to gain influence in others’ lives not through showmanship or manipulation but through a genuine habit of expressing greater respect, empathy, and grace.

two highest levels of influence are achieved when (1) people follow you because of what you’ve done for them and (2) people follow you because of who you are. In other words, the highest levels of influence are reached when generosity and trustworthiness surround your behavior.

What all come to understand is that there is no such thing as a neutral exchange. You leave someone either a little better or a little worse.3 The best among us leave others a little better with every nod, every inflection, every interface. This one idea embodied daily has significant results.